Managing emotions
What are the common challenges?
These could include:
- Intense outbursts
- Difficulty tolerating frustration
- Heightened emotional reactivity
- Sensitive to perceived or actual rejection
What impact does this have on you?
- Missed deadlines or incomplete tasks.
- Strain on work, relationships and personal routines.
What are your personal triggers?
Everyone’s triggers are different. It can help to:
- Notice patterns that set off strong emotions
- Self-monitor to identify these patterns
- Find possible adjustments to reduce unhelpful emotional reactions
- Keep a diary to track the emotions you experience
What can we do about it?
Now that we know which emotions we experience and how they might affect us, it’s time to think about what we can do about them.
- Plan for emotional triggers
- Build tolerance for discomfort
- Grounding with the 5 senses
- Self-soothing activities
- Ride the wave
- Use opposite action
Building your personal toolkit
Now that we know which strategies can help, let’s take a closer look at each one. This will help you build your own personal toolkit for managing emotions and feeling more in control.
Plan for emotional triggers
What it is:
Emotional situations that typically trigger strong emotions, and planning how to respond.
How to do it:
- List common triggers (e.g. criticism, busy environments).
- Develop a simple response plan for each one.
- Keep tools handy to help manage these moments (e.g. headphones, a reminder note).
Why it helps:
Anticipating triggers makes it easier to feel in control when emotions run high.
Build tolerance for discomfort
What it is:
A skill to help you sit with uncomfortable emotions without reacting or escaping.
How to do it:
- Acknowledge the discomfort and remind yourself it will pass.
- Delay your reaction – count slowly to ten or take a breath.
- Focus on the physical sensations without needing to change them.
Why it helps:
Reduces impulsive reactions and helps you respond more calmly.
Grounding with the five senses
What it is:
A way to refocus on the present moment by using your senses.
How to do it:
- 5 things you can see
- 4 things you can feel
- 3 things you can hear
- 2 things you can smell
- 1 thing you can taste
Why it helps:
Grounding interrupts overwhelming thoughts and calms your mind.
Self-soothing strategies
What it is:
Simple activities that help you feel comforted and calm when emotions run high.
How to do it:
- Choose activities that feel safe and comforting (e.g. warm tea, music, a short walk).
- Make them part of your routine so you can turn to them when needed.
- Focus fully on the activities, using all your senses.
Why it helps:
These activities can reduce the intensity of strong emotions and help you feel balanced.
Ride the wave
What it is:
A technique to manage intense emotions by letting them rise and fall naturally.
How to do it:
- Acknowledge and label the emotion.
- Let yourself feel it without acting impulsively.
- Use deep, steady breaths to help it pass.
- Notice how the emotion fades over time.
Why it helps:
This reinforces that emotions are temporary and helps you avoid impulsive decisions.
Use opposite action
What it is:
Choosing to act in a way that’s opposite to your initial emotional impulse.
How to do it:
- Identify the urge (e.g. to shout, avoid, withdraw).
- Choose a calmer or more balanced action (e.g. speak softly, engage instead of withdrawing).
- Follow through, even if it feels unnatural at first.
Why it helps:
It breaks the cycle of reactive behaviour and supports more thoughtful responses.
Empowering yourself with practical emotional skills
By identifying your triggers and building a personalised toolkit – like grounding, self-soothing, and opposite action – you’ll gain tools to stay calmer and more in control. These skills empower you to handle emotions more effectively as you move forward, making everyday life smoother and setting you up for continued growth.